Summary: We spend too much time seeing the world as abstractions. As polls, statistics, satellite photos, arrows on maps — dry and lifeless data. Here we also show culture in motion by our popular art. It gives us a living mirror to see who we are in real time. Today Taylor Swift explains how women deal with men in the new world of the 21st century. She speaks to her peers, which has made her one of the top singers of her generation. This is another in a series exploring this new world.
“Cause darling I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.” {From “Blank Space”.}
Contents
- Beta males: use ’em and dump ’em.
- Alpha males: bad but fun.
- The game is fun but doesn’t work.
- For More Information.
(1) Beta males: use ’em and dump ’em
Taylor Swift gives us a brutally honest account of beta male’s role in the new gender economy, providing high status women with ego boosting light entertainment. Betas are the warm-up act before the real action. AKA, they’re exploitable fools, wining and dining a girl while she waits for a booty call. Here we see why “hook ups” replace dating, and the genesis of the blowback known as game.
“The Way I Loved You” (From Fearless
He is sensible and so incredible
And all my single friends are jealous
He says everything I need to hear and it’s like
I couldn’t ask for anything better
He opens up my door and I get into his car
And he says you look beautiful tonight
And I feel perfectly fine
But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
And it’s 2am and I’m cursing your name
You’re so in love that you act insane
And that’s the way I loved you
Breakin’ down and coming undone
It’s a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that’s the way I loved you
He respects my space
And never makes me wait
And he calls exactly when he says he will
He’s close to my mother
Talks business with my father
He’s charming and endearing
And I’m comfortable
He can’t see the smile I’m faking
And my heart’s not breaking
Cause I’m not feeling anything at all
And you were wild and crazy
Just so frustrating intoxicating
Complicated, got away by some mistake and now
And that’s the way I loved you oh, oh
Never knew I could feel that much
And that’s the way I loved you
(2) Alpha males: bad but fun
Taylor Swift provides a remarkably candid account of lower class life in 21st century America, locked into patterns that provide emotional highs but no foundation for the nuclear family.
“I Knew You Were Trouble” (From Red
Once upon a time a few mistakes ago
I was in your sights, you got me alone
You found me, you found me, you found me
I guess you didn’t care, and I guess I liked that
And when I fell hard you took a step back
Without me, without me, without me
And she’s long gone when she’s next to me
And I realize the blame is on me
‘Cause I knew you were trouble when you walked in
So shame on me now
Flew me to places I’d never been
‘Til you put me down, oh
I knew you were trouble when you walked in
So shame on me now
Flew me to places I’d never been
Now I’m lying on the cold hard ground
Oh, oh, trouble, trouble, trouble
Oh, oh, trouble, trouble, trouble
No apologies. She’ll never see you cry,
Pretends she doesn’t know that she’s the reason why.
You’re drowning, you’re drowning, you’re drowning.
Now I heard you moved on from whispers on the street
A new notch in your belt is all I’ll ever be
And now I see, now I see, now I see
She was long gone when he met me
And I realize the joke is on me, yeah!
When the saddest fear comes creeping in
That you never loved me or him, or anyone, or anything, yeah
Swift recorded several songs with this message. Another is “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” (2012). See the lyrics and the music video.
(3) The game is fun but doesn’t work well
Taylor Swift shows us dynamics of the next generation’s gender relations, as the increasing number of higher income women date poorer alpha men. Biologically programmed for hypergamy (seeking high status men), what will they select for when there are relatively few high income men (in a society with far more educated women and high levels of inequality)? Swift suggests they’ll select for alphaness. The type of men colloquially known as “dicks” and “assholes”.
These will usually be stormy and transitory relationships. We’ll see the households of economically self-supporting mothers with serial partners, a unpleasant environment for her children (especially for her daughters, who will have a high rate of sexual abuse). Like so many forms of destructive social trends, liberals applaud. See “Just Say No. For white working-class women, it makes sense to stay single mothers” in Slate.
As we see today, stable marriages will remain common in the upper classes, a class-based analog to associative mating. It’s already happening, and a major driver of income inequality. To see this explained in art: Beckett shows our future. She chooses wisely & marries Castle, but dreams at night of her alpha ex-boyfriend.
“Blank Space” (From 1989
Nice to meet you, where you been?
I could show you incredible things
Magic, madness, heaven, sin
Saw you there and I thought
Oh my God, look at that face
You look like my next mistake
Love’s a game, wanna play?
New money, suit and tie
I can read you like a magazine
Ain’t it funny, rumors fly
And I know you heard about me
So hey, let’s be friends
I’m dying to see how this one ends
Grab your passport and my hand
I can make the bad guys good for a weekend
So it’s gonna be forever
Or it’s gonna go down in flames
You can tell me when it’s over
If the high was worth the pain
Got a long list of ex-lovers
They’ll tell you I’m insane
‘Cause you know I love the players
And you love the game
‘Cause we’re young and we’re reckless
We’ll take this way too far
It’ll leave you breathless
Or with a nasty scar
Got a long list of ex-lovers
They’ll tell you I’m insane
But I’ve got a blank space, baby
And I’ll write your name
Cherry lips, crystal skies
I could show you incredible things
Stolen kisses, pretty lies
You’re the King, baby, I’m your Queen
Find out what you want
Be that girl for a month
Wait, the worst is yet to come, oh no
Screaming, crying, perfect storms
I can make all the tables turn
Rose garden filled with thorns
Keep you second guessing like
“Oh my God, who is she?”
I get drunk on jealousy
But you’ll come back each time you leave
‘Cause, darling, I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream
Boys only want love if it’s torture
Don’t say I didn’t say, I didn’t warn ya
Boys only want love if it’s torture
Don’t say I didn’t say, I didn’t warn ya
For More Information
If you liked this post, like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter. See all posts about women and gender issues, especially these about our new world of romance (section 2). Watch the TV show “Castle” for a clear vision of our future.
- Spoilers for “Castle”: explaining the finale & season 7. It’s a metaphor for America.
- The TV show “Castle” challenges us to see our changing values. Most fans decline, horrified.
- “Castle” shows us marriage in America, a fault line between our past & future.
- “Castle” shows us a dark vision of Romance in America.
- “Castle” helps us adjust to a new America, with women on top.
- Beckett shows our future. She chooses wisely & marries Castle, but dreams at night of her alpha ex-boyfriend.